(From Tricha?! O.o from September 2010)
Tricha: (origin: my head) female person who struggles with trichotillomania
Trichotillomania: abnormal desire and compulsion to pull out one's own hair
People joke about being so stressed out or frustrated that they're ripping out their hair. Typically, they do not literally extract hairs from their heads; it's just an expression to them. Unfortunately, this is not the scenario for everyone. Some of us actually do pull out our hair... and when it is labeled as Trichotillomania, it is not just the act of pulling it out. It is a real issue, in particular, resulting in bald spots... sometimes even permanent ones!
Personally, I have been struggling with this mania for two years. As I have shared this burden with close friends, I have also been researching it. Most of the medical research I found stated that this problem, if developed at an older age (meaning older than about 10, which I definitely am), is never really cured or conquered. The maniac (or in my words: the tricho/a) struggles with this abnormal desire for the rest of their life... falling back into it and then landing in spurts of freedom and then right back again. This, not surprisingly, was depressing news... and still is.
BUT one of my friends offered me great hope! He pointed out that I am very quiet about this struggle because I am greatly embarrassed and ashamed. It seems so silly to me and I'm afraid of people looking down on me for actually struggling with it! I look down on me for it! He said if most people are like me when they have trichotillomania... wouldn't it make sense that you wouldn't hear about them conquering it? I have spent quite a bit of time pondering and considering this idea. If I could magically be free, would I bother to tell people it was ever a struggle? Well, I know the answer to that one! No! I'd be so glad to be rid of it! I would be so happy that I was free and no longer have the need for anyone to ever find out about it. It could be my own little secret- tucked away out of sight, hopefully to one day be forgotten.
So I have created this blog now with the confidence that I will be free from this mania one day. I want others like me to be able to read this and be encouraged knowing that someone truly understands their struggle, which seems so odd and so unusual. And ultimately for them to see that someone else has made it through... that the journey is not easy, but it is possible! I believe fully that if I had had some sort of hope a year ago that I would be far along on my road to recovery if not fully recovered already. But one year ago, I had no hope of ever defeating this terrible beast that currently controls me. This just made the issue worse, because I was really upset about it and frustrated and stressed... all things that are guaranteed triggers for my mania to rear its ugly head.
I imagine that my other posts will be immensely different from this one. This is my informative post, just to get you started and help you understand where I'm coming from. I have never blogged before, so we shall see how this works, but I'm pretty excited to see what will happen on this blog! I look forward with great anticipation to reading all these posts and following my path to recovery and freedom. One day, I will lose the title of Tricha, but for now you can follow along and get inside the mind of a "Modern Day Tricha".
