I know it's been quite a while again...
Well, I'll quickly fill you in.
First, in my last post I shared with you about a major victory. It ended up that I lasted a FULL THREE WEEKS without pulling!!! Although I was counting just a couple hairs that I pulled in my timer, I did keep track of when I had pulled so if I went a long time without ANY hairs I could rejoice in that incredible victory. This was indeed an amazing victory!!!
The hardest part for me to fathom was how it actually seemed incredibly normal NOT to pull during that time. I kept my guard up but was amazed how I wasn't longing for it. That's part of why it was hard when I did fall.
It happened accidentally. There wasn't a huge pile beside me; I wasn't coaching myself saying "No! No! Don't do it. You've lasted so long. Just a little bit longer. No!"; I simply pulled out a hair. I was stunned.
After that it was SO hard to get back on top. I fell right back into pulling.It's been a roller coaster with no great victories. Of course small ones here and there and small failures here and there as well.
Since I last posted, I have bought clip-in hair extensions. Basically, I have sections of fake hair that I can clip into my real hair. When I do my hair up in certain ways, you can't tell that it's not mine and it's great to be able to DO things with my hair again!
This past weekend, I realized that most of my hair is getting much longer. There is one portion that I'm struggling with in particular which is the shorter section. Anyway, I noticed that as the hair is getting longer, it's getting softer and easier to manipulate. Basically, it's returning to the way it was before! My hair was great to work with and it's coming back! I haven't ruined my hair forever!!!! YAY!
Now I am really trying to not pull in that area (the top back) so it can grow out and my hair can be unified and look wonderful! Behind each of my ears is thinner and shorter as well, but it's less obvious unless I wear my hair down, which I haven't been doing. Thank you for your support and prayers!
Hello,
ReplyDeleteI'm excited about your progress! I am also a hair puller. It's been 10 years now. I can go long periods of time without pulling and then it sneaks back into my life! It's a struggle that I constantly pray over. I'm desperate to be delivered from this disorder and will continue pray without ceasing until God delivers me. I will also pray for you too!