Do not give in to the temptation to “just touch,” or “pull just one.” One leads to two, two leads to five and then it becomes difficult to stop.
YOU CAN sit through the feelings that accompany not pulling. If we hold in tears, we will turn to our hair. You and I MUST cry when we need to.
Feelings lie- they will tell you that the only way to get rid of your feelings is to pull some hair. They scream, “these feelings are permanent! The only way out is to pull!”
The only way to quit feeling something is to feel it. “Don’t just do something-stand there!”
How does one feel their feelings? Sit down and be very still. Breathe. You will know when the feeling is done being felt. Welcome your feelings!
Feelings are always changing, they never stay the same. “This too shall pass.”
The relief that comes from pulling is fleeting. Feelings of shame, helplessness, and depression always follow a pulling episode.
And pulling never changes the situation that often brought us to pulling.
Do not give permission to your hands to rise above your shoulders.
It is a choice to pull. Nobody forces your hand.
The more you say no, the easier it gets.
“One hair is too much, a thousand is never enough.”~Taken from an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting. The word drink is substituted for hair.
I'm realizing (again and more internally) that there is some underlying reason for the pulling. Something is obviously leading to the pulling. Pulling my hair out is a coping mechanism that I have learned- it's there to cope with something! I just don't know what. I need to find out what it is. I also want to know how I should deal with this. If anyone of you have ideas of how I can properly deal with issues, thoughts, emotions, please tell me!!!!! Thanks. Pulling hair is what my body thinks is the only way to get rid of the problem/ pain- literally pulling it out of the body through the head!
these feelings are permanent!
ReplyDeleteReminds of me of what I thought/felt once upon a time. I find simply knowing that feelings are not, in fact, permanent, astonishingly helpful.
As for how to properly deal with feelings--well, you know I'm still working on that. And I can only give you the creative introvert example, but I know you do share the creative part so maybe it will be helpful.
Putting things I'm feeling into music I'm playing, listening to music that expresses the feeling I can't figure out how to (classical or not, whatever seems most appropriate), writing reflective prose (diary-entry type), writing fiction, writing poetry, drawing, talking it out. Spending time *alone* with God is a biggie for me--being still in His presence, praying out what's on my mind, reading His Word. It doesn't necessarily "fix" the feelings, but it is helpful.
Also, if you're having a hard time figuring out *what's* bothering you, personally, I find keeping a diary really helpful.
I know you're not me, and it will probably take some time for you to figure out what works for you.
Hey girl!
ReplyDeleteDon't give permission to trich to make decisions for you- even if it's hard, do things you would normally do, regardless of hair status.
Do not give hair pulling permission to run your life- that's crossing the line into idolatry.
Hope this helps, praying for you!
Kat
Hi Aimee. This is Iman. Hmm, ways to cope? I have heard many a time that writing down your feelings and concerns right when they enter your head can help with anxiety.
ReplyDeleteRemember, God calls us to turn to him in times of trouble. So that voice about the feelings being permanent and only being stopped by the pulling of hair is a really perfect life. Satan knows what he's doing. But you are already victorious, girl. I love you.
I would literally tell those "voices" that coax you to pull "just one" that they have been overcome by truth and they are the lie.
I love you!